In Cape Breton live Cape Bretoners from Scotland
They are there because they had to leave their home
They’re kinda bored and kinda sore about it
but in Canada there’s nothing they can do.

Oh, oh Canada
It’s so dull and boring standing guard for thee
Is there nothing else around here?
Than try to find a job and watch TV?

The Indians knew how to make it happen
Didn’t even have to borrow from the bank.
Imagine, talking to all those animals
Then this land was something, not a blank.

Our young Canadians today are running to the West
For reasons of their own and none specific
Oh Canada, now you tell them that there’s nothing out there
So they don’t go belly-up in the Pacific.

Stick it in your ear Ontario
How far from your Tower of Babel will you stoop
You’re so god damned inhibited and careful
Don’t even drop your pants to have a poop.

Oh oh Canada
It’s so dull and boring standing guard for thee
Is this really all you want of us?
To try to find a job and watch TV?

Oh. So Canada has packed its bags and left us
To build a place somewhere up in the snow
Will Canada come back here for the summers?
The newsman said last night he didn’t know.

Colin MacAdam, circa 1977|
(Happy 150th Canada, eh!)